I'm just like you. Wait, no, I'm a giant crustacean from the paleolithic era. But even I need money to sustain myself.
I've tried being an alien from space, a girl scout, and even an optometrist.
If everyone reading this donated $3.50, I would only have to ask for one day a year. But not everyone can or will donate. Some say “I ain't giving you no tree-fitty you goddamn Loch Ness monster! Get your own goddamn money!” or “Dammit monster! You stop bugging my children now! We work for our money in this house and we don't give money away!”. And that's fine. Each year just enough people decide to give.(Looking at you Chef's Mom)
This year, please consider making a donation of $3.50, $2.50, or $1 to protect and sustain the Loch Ness Monster.
Thanks,
'Nessie'
The Loch Ness Monster
P.S. While you're here consider making a donation to my kind hosts, Null Space Labs